The great spinning. An introduction to 5-meo integration.
Introduction: Embracing Transformation through Psychedelic Healing
In the realm of psychedelics, 5-MeO-DMT is often regarded as a profound empathogen, offering unparalleled access to the depths of consciousness and self-awareness. This blog delves into “The Great Spinning,” a personal journey through the discomfort, awakening, and integration that accompanies the use of this powerful medicine.
The Struggle: A Path to Awakening
I woke up to a world spinning out of control. Every movement felt like a wave of nausea crashing into me, my head throbbing like a relentless drum. The overwhelming pull of darkness was back—nihilism, self-pity, dread—all wrapping me like a suffocating blanket. My thoughts spiralled into doom and fear. Was this the price of my healing journey? Had I gone too far? The light I had once glimpsed seemed so distant, replaced by these shadows threatening to consume me. Why was I so afraid? Where did all this fear inside me come from?
The Gift of 5-MeO-DMT: A Somatic Cleansing
5-MeO-DMT is often called the ‘God Molecule’ for its ability to connect users to a profound sense of unity and source energy. It works as an energetic plunger, releasing blockages and creating space for authentic self-awareness. This isn’t a quick fix (though for some it can be); it’s a process of peeling away layers of old conditioning to uncover the core of who you are.
The initial stages may feel jarring—like opening Pandora’s box—but they are necessary should you choose to embark on the grandest quest of mankind – the discovery of who you are. The medicine invites you to observe your ego, witness your shadows, and choose to step into the light and know God. Psychedelics like 5-MeO-DMT don’t “fix” you; they offer a mirror to reflect your inner world, urging you to confront and release what no longer serves you.
The morning passed in turmoil. I lay in bed, crying and wrestling with my inner demons. The battle wasn’t just emotional; my body felt overloaded, as though my nervous system had reached its limit. The spinning world triggered panic and fight and flight. What if this vertigo was permanent? What if I was trapped here forever? Exhausted, I finally drifted into an uneasy sleep. My mind continued its boxing match, swinging at self-created shadows while yearning for relief.
But as the inner storm raged, a subtle shift began. Beneath the chaos, my heart stirred with a quiet realization: this was my ego desperately clinging to what it knew—years of darkness and despair. The medicine had shown me a glimpse of love and light, and my system and ego were fighting to adjust to the energetic process. This wasn’t a punishment but an invitation. The struggle WAS the process. The feelings were the demons. I was starting to recognize that all of this struggle was self-created by my mind and not really real.
The discomfort wasn’t a barrier; it was the path to liberation. My body was releasing years of pent-up energy and years of negative self-talk in order to recalibrate into a higher vibration and way of being. The darkness was a gift, a teacher showing me what needed to be released, in order to step into the light. As I surrendered the fight and fully allowed myself to step into the heaviness, it began to lift. I wasn’t just experiencing pain; I was unclogging my system, making space for something new to enter and become my new way of being. The medicine was somatic, an energetic cleanse for my soul. I began to recognize my old self. The one I no longer wanted to be. The more I observed myself, the more I could see the authentic self hidden underneath just waiting to shine through. It was a CHOICE. The choice to stay consumed with the dark or the choice to begin the sometimes painful and uncomfortable process of going through it and moving into the light.
The 5-MeO-DMT great release.
I reflected upon the experience itself. There’s a reason 5-MeO is deemed the greatest empathogen. It truly is the gift of God. It’s a somatic process which creates an energetic reconditioning of your entire being. It’s like an energetic plunger to awakening. You must be ready to unplug your system and with this unplugging great energy is released. The more that’s unplugged, the more the energy can move through and connect you to the source. The source of YOU and a return to UNITY and to GOD. It can be jarring and most unexpected. But it can also be beautiful and awe-inspiring. Underneath all the stuff clogging your system is an indescribable beauty and feeling of love. As I continue to work with this medicine, more and more I realize that all the pain and struggle is worth it. This isn’t about a singular process, it’s about becoming you and your authentic self as you release old baggage. Let go of the old, step fully into the new and choose differently.
Be Gentle With Yourself
Awakening isn’t all bliss; it’s a commitment to truth and transformation. It’s about facing the parts of ourselves we’ve long ignored, letting them bubble to the surface, and then gently releasing them. Healing happens when we accept the dark as part of the light and when we meet our shadows with love instead of resistance.
As you move through your own Great Cleanse, remember: be patient and be kind to yourself. Transformation doesn’t happen overnight, and it’s not always comfortable. But every moment of struggle is an opportunity to release what no longer serves you, allowing the light to take its place. When your inner world shifts, so too will your outer world. This is the journey, this is the GIFT of the process. You are not alone. God is inside you waiting to be remembered and awakened.
Petra Valica
This article was written for educational purposes. I don’t condone the use of any illegal substances, and as with any potent psychedelic substance, please be responsible and use a supportive, experienced guide or facilitator who can contribute to a safe and meaningful exploration of the 5-MeO experience.
